I still have feelings for my ex… but I’m dating his best friend. Help?

Asked: I still have feelings for my ex… but I’m dating his best friend. Help?

Basically, my first love was my ex. I'd never had a boyfriend before so when he dumped me without giving me an explanation, it made it a lot harder to get 'over' him even though we only went out for a few months. After a couple of months, I contemplated dating again but after finding someone, I realised I was still on the rebound. Maybe 2 months after that, my ex's best friend, who I'd been fairly good friends with since my ex introduced us (while we were dating) told me that he had feelings for me. I felt ready to contemplate getting into a relationship again and he'd spoken to my ex to see if he minded us dating which he hadn't. I didn't start dating him to get back at my ex but because I genuinely liked my boyfriend- my only concern was that I didn't want it to seem like I was dating my ex's best friend to spite him. My ex has since told me that he broke up with me because he has commitment issues and I've seen him in a new light considering how badly he handled our break up. I can see he wasn't a good boyfriend to me and I at that time was too young to be a good girlfriend to him. In contrast, my current boyfriend is so kind and we've always got on really well. We've been dating for nearly 9 months now, compared to the 3 months I spent with my ex, and we have a really happy relationship. I truly love my boyfriend and I lost my virginity to him (we were both 18 and are responsible) but there's still this attraction I feel for my ex when I see him or think about him when we dated. I can see how he's matured and I can tell I still have some feelings for him, even though I know that he hurt me and that we weren't as good together as me and my current boyfriend. Is this a problem? Is it understandable that despite genuinely loving my boyfriend and wanting to be with him, that I have some unresolved feelings for my first love? I'm hoping that time will help me get over my ex completely, since we dated less than a year ago, but I'd kind of like some advice.

Oh, I don't want to break up with my boyfriend because I love him to pieces but I'm just a bit concerned that I still have this soft spot for my ex despite the way he treated me and that I'm in a happy relationship. I don't want to hurt my boyfriend in any way icon sad I still have feelings for my ex... but Im dating his best friend. Help?

(and I've reposted this question because I asked this at like 1am this morning and so I don't think I've got many responses because of that)


It is perfectly natural to have feelings for your first boyfriend.

They say you never forget your first one and I certainly haven't forgotten mine.

It doesn't mean though that you hold a torch for them the same way that you have strong feelings for your current boyfriend.

I guess the hard part is that because he is a friend of your boyfriend you would be seeing him more often than most people see their exes.

As long as you know where your true feelings are then there shouldn't be any problems and just accept that it is natural to feel how you do about the ex.

Enjoy your current relationship.

Too hard situation, we guys tells as long as ur ex not in relation with ur best friend as long as its ok
So for him now it's too hard and he consider u that u want to break his heart by dating his best friend
Time is good in ur situation and sorry to say its messed up relations
Probably a first love thing. Its probably nothing to worry about if you truly, genuinely love your current boyfriend.
Your a naughty girl lol an your ex's best friend is with you now cone on smh he is not a good friend an trust me keep that to yourself ok? Cuz it will mess both of them up try dealing withit yourself.

Got a better answer? Share it below!

Related posts:

  1. I still have deep feelings for my ex, advice please.?
  2. Need advice..what should I do about my boyfriends, friend?
  3. My friend (girl) is now dating another friend of mine, but the girl and i have gotten much closer si
  4. How to ask my friend on a date? (Its complicated)?
  5. Should i date my best friend?